"I never knew of a morning in Africa when I woke up that I

was not happy."

-Ernest Hemmingway

Sunday, March 27, 2011

Botswana Stew

A delightful dish that tickles the palate. Set aside several days for preparation as the flavors take time to develop...
Ingredients
-2 letters, mailed from a foreign address
-1 scrumptious muffin
-1 combi door
-2 broken umbrellas
-1 tapestry, woven by lovely old ladies
-1 independent film
-100 student-athletes, or substitue 100 students posing as athletes
-1 Chinese dinner, enjoyed by candlelight
-8 cold showers
-1 pitch party, hosted by a private school
Instructions
1. Ask family or friends to send letters to the Office of International Education and Partnerships Office, University of Botswana. Wait one month. Wait another month. Inquire at the local post office. Inquire at the University of Botswana post office. Inquire at the International Education Office. Write your name at the bottom of a long list of students with missing mail. Wait...
2. Take a stroll down to Riverwalk Mall. Locate Equatorial Cafe and sit down at a table or voluminous couch. Order a blackforest muffin (other menu choices available, ask the waiter for details). Take full advantage of the free internet. Indulge.
3. Hop on a combi with too many people. Ride down a pot hole ridden track at break neck speeds. With any luck the door will automatically fall off. If not, have drunken passengers bash at it. Continue driving and pretend not to notice.
4. Go for a walk when nasty looking clouds are building in the distance. Bring umbrellas and a friend. Open umbrellas when torrential downpour begins. Wade to the nearest shelter. Battle hurricane force winds. Abandon sodden, bent, and sad looking umbrellas.
5. Find a combi labeled “Oodi” and step on board. Travel out to a remote village and greet friendly old ladies. Observe sheep shearing, wool spinning, wool dying, and wool weaving. When english fails, use flambuoyant hand gestures to communicate. Ogle handiwork and beautiful designs. Purchase a tapestry for 300 Pula.
6. Walk to Maru-a-Pula secondary school. Avoid cows en route. Squish into tiny theatre hall with other students, nuns, businessmen, professors, media people, and tourists. Take advantage of free refreshments. Watch a well directed and shocking film about sex trafficking. Spend an evening contemplating the messages.
7. Wake up early and go for a jog. Investigate frenzied cheering at the UB Stadium. Run stairs. Watch a pseudo student track meet. Wonder whether bare feet and jean shorts are appropriate sprinting attire. Wonder whether dresses are appropriate hurdling attire!
8. Grab a taxi to African Mall. Navigate around shifty looking bars and link arms with friends. Locate Chinese restaurant (preferably before 7:00pm or the establishment will be closed). Order wonton soup. Do not panic when power failure hits. Hope squishy lumps in bowl really are wontons. Finish meal by candlelight.
9. Live at the Las Vegas dorms. Go to the bathroom on the second floor of Block A3. Turn on the hot water tap and take a cold shower every morning. When the water stops working, walk to the pool for a shower. Stockpile drinking water!
10. Drive out to a private school in Gaborone. Gape at gigantic gated houses and one enormous mansion. Count 15 air conditioner units in the mansion windows. Pass security and enter school. Gape at immaculate grounds and facilities. Watch badly behaved children run rampant. Join better behaved children on the soccer pitch. Pretend to lack dribbling abilities and get kicked in the shins. Nurse injuries over a lovely slice of cake.

Monday, March 14, 2011

Midterm Report

Name: University of Botswana

Course Content   B
-I used to get hand cramps after lectures back in the States or would go home (particularly after Organic Chemistry) and bang my head on the desk. Here at UB there is a relative lack of material. But is quantity better than quality? At the very least I have a better understanding of the concepts covered thanks to repitition. And outside reading certainly won't hurt the cause.
Course Choice/Availability   B
-on the plus side, there are a number of courses that aren't available in North America (eg. Wildlife Biology of Southern Africa)
-on the other hand, many courses are only offerred during a specific semester, and there's a high degree of course conflict within each faculty (this might not be an issue though, as apparently teachers have the freedom to change their course time and location even after student registration has taken place. Hmm)
Campus Facilities   B-
-classrooms are reasonably modern and most are equipped with teaching aids (eg. Projectors)
-though a regular library patron back home, I rarely frequent the UB library. Why? You can't bring your backpack inside. Instead it's necessary to stand in a mile long line to check your bag and then carry your belongings/laptop/books in you arms. Or balanced on your head. Though that might attract undue attention.
-there are limited printing and computing facilities on campus. The library is equipped with only two printers that respond to only two computers. One of them usually isn't working. And the line is always long.
-laundry room? Perhaps by next semester the TEN washing machines (out of a total of 15) with permanent "out of order" signs will have been repaired.
Professor:Student ratio   A (at least for the upper level courses)
-my average class size this semester is approximately eight. Finally, I can remember all my classmates names!
Professors   C
-again, you win some you lose some. While most of my professors certainly know what they're talking about, there is a slightly different student-teacher realtionship. The States tends to allow for debate and encourages students to have an active voice. A degree of respect for the professor certainly needs to be maintained, but at the same time there is an aooprtunity for student feedback. I do believe my Wildlife Biology professor (sorry, “nature detective” as he prefers to be addressed) would eat my head off if I questioned his behaviour. Showing up twenty minutes late to class (not a one time thing either)? Actually, we the students are at fault for not breaking down the locked classroom door and starting discussions about....well, not sure. That's around the time I stopped listening to him lecture us. I don't think it's right for a professor to condescend to, or verbally berate his students like it's a game.
Grading Scheme   D
-never mind relaxed, easy lectures or irresponsible professors. Come exam day you'd better be in your desk early with a head full of notes and textbooks. The discrepancy is ridiculous! I am not a 60% student, even on my worst days, but that number has appeared all too frequently on my assigments. And forget scoring above 90%...that's unheard of. Above 80%, you're a genius. 70% and above, solid pat on the back. Now, I might be getting a nice back massage these days but I'm certainly not satisfied with the grades. Institutions in Africa might understand the system and not expect straight As across the board on a transcript, but the same can't be said for North America. Whether from thousands of miles away or just across town, a C grade kills your GPA just as effectively. So students be warned! The experience is wonderful and the African perspective interesting...but perhaps look into the pass/fail grade option before choosing the University of Botswana. If you get that approved, you're golden. 
Administrative Staff   B
-this category is a bit of a coin toss. I've dealt with a few helpful and positive individuals, but the majority seem to either hate their job, or hate students. Particularly the cafeteria staff, though perhaps that's because I always cause problems by requesting TWO teaspoons of vegetables instead of the allowed one. Heaven forbid.
Security   D
-I managed (quite daftly) to get myself locked out of my dorm room after a run one afternoon. The RA in every block has a master key, but is only available during a few hour long periods on select days of the week (nicely outlined on bright pink paper posted on the RA's door). I guess tough luck if you require assistance outside those times. I thus went to explain my predicament to the two security guards lounging in the pavillion. After much waffling and sending me off on pointless searches one of them begrudgingly agreed to take me to see the warden (who also has a master key). Or so I thought. There was indeed someone inside the warden's house and music was blaring. I managed to attract the attention of the lady and the guard explained the situation to her in Setswana. Or so I thought! The guard left, the lady slouched back inside, and I stood dumbly expecting her to return with the magical key. Nothing happened for a long five minutes. I knocked on the door and asked about the master key. The very confused lady explained that the guard had said nothing of my predicament and just ordered her to turn the music down. Also, the warden had been off campus for the past week and wasn't expected back for several days (which all security personnel were informed of). Really now!?! Needless to say I've stopped smiling at the guards when I walk past in the morning. Spiteful? Perhaps. Immature? Probably. But that was one heck of a hungry, sweaty, tired evening.
And it's rarely comforting to see security personnel sleeping on the job...
Campus Activities   A
-UB has numerous clubs and organizations to join. Dance aerobics? There's a place for you. Kung Fu master? Come on down. Movie lover? Grab your popcorn. In fact, the most frustrating element is the sheer number of possibilities yet a limited schedule in which to accomodate them all. And I've tried!

Monday, March 7, 2011

Semester Break: Okavango Delta

 The Old Bridge Backpackers welcomed us to Botswana's Delta city. We paid the 50Pula camping fee and were generously provided with a heavy duty (African monsoon proof) tent and sleeping pads. The establishment featured an outdoor bar with Christmas lights and plenty enough beer drinkers to fill it. An amiable and interesting crowd nonetheless. We ordered hot chocolates and passed a relaxing evening in hammocks overlooking the riverfront. There was fresh news circulating about a tragic accident: A guide and one tourist drowned after a hippo overturned their mokoro (dug-out canoe). A harsh reminder of the inherent dangers of the wilderness. The following morning brought cloudy skies and the long awaited mokoro safari. We met our seasoned guide, the seemingly immortal Kosi. Gear securely wrapped in plastic bags, we pushed away from shore. The reeds parted before the prow of the mokoro and flowers sat like delicate teacups on their lily pad plates. Truly surreal. We pitched our tents on a small island in the shade of a giant fig tree. The evening adventure? Hippopotamus tracking. Too bad it started to rain. We got thoroughly soaked despite the hardy ponchos and didn't find a single hippo. Dinner consisted of canned beans, canned corn, and canned tuna. Enjoyed by flashlight straight out of the tin. It's strange how good food can taste when you're cold, wet, and squashed inside an unventilated tent. That was one very long night. Our guide knocked on the tent flap at five o'clock the next morning. “We go for a walk now, yes?” Well heck, alrighty! We poled by mokoro to a neighbouring island and disembarked. Apparently for a five hour hike through the African bush. Which came as a bit of a surprise, particularly as we hadn't thought to bring anything except a camera. Not my proudest moment. I'll have to claim that something was lost in translation, or that a lack of sleep impaired my judgement. Either way we were all without water under a blazing hot sun. The intrepid Kosi had downed 5 litres (FIVE LITRES!?!) of water that morning and was set for the day. As a result he took countless breaks to go “hide himself,” an expression that I found highly entertaining. The hike itself was exceptional: we crossed several lion tracks, surprised a herd of zebra, battled through marshy grasses, and caught sight of a family of wildebeest. A scorched red face and patched throat were the only downside. A lesson learnt the hard way I suppose. After lunch we set off once again in search of the ever elusive hippo. This time, success. Though only observed from afar, I enjoyed the chorus of grunts, snorts, laughs, and snuffles that issued from the gargantuan logs. An impending storm forced a speedy return to camp and we packed up in record time. With shelter and hot tea as future prospects I was able to enjoy the rainy journey back to Old Bridge. We must have looked quite frightening as we emerged from the boats: angry red faces, wild tangles of hair, and sodden ponchos. The lodge staff were all too quick to help. We enjoyed a phenomenal dinner of warm brownies and sat for hours under a blanket watching burly men play rugby. No finer way to spend an evening. I was quite sad to be packing my bags the next morning. We squashed onto a bus for the twelve hour ride back to Gaborone. Back to routines, school, and obligations. Sigh.
“Snap back to reality, oh there goes gravity...” in the words of Eminem. The only white rapper that locals claim can feel the music like a true African.

Sunday, March 6, 2011

Semester Break: Victoria Falls

After another day of data collection I said goodbye to my classmates, with a great deal of regret. I might have been the only female in a group of ten, but felt welcome, comfortable, and appreciated at every moment. But adventure was calling. I met up in Kasane with my travel companions (internaitonal students from the States and Mexico) and we headed for Zambia. My biology professor drove us to the border crossing (fully redeeming himself for countless absences and late appearances) and negotiated with a local to boat us across the Zambezi river. We paid 50USD for a single entry visa into Zambia,and after beating off drones of vendors and hawkers, landed a ride with a group of tourists. The drive to Livingstone was quick and easy. We unloaded out baggage at the JollyBoys backpackers, a lodge true to its name in every sense. The atmosphere was relaxed and friendly, the staff helpful, and the toilet paper pink. I summoned my inner Bohemian and felt right at home. One night's stay in the dorms cost 8USD. We woke up bright and early Tuesday morning for a visit to Victoria Falls via minibus (Zambian combi). The World Heritage Site was unbelievable- the falls span a width of almost two kilometres and drop over six hundred metres at the highest point. Even equipped with rain jackets we were thoroughly soaked in the heavy mists. After a short trek to the bottom of the falls we headed back into town. A walk through the local market earned us a few bolts of chitenge fabric (used to make beautifully patterned skirts) and a slightly deranged stalker lady. She kept insisting that she was our dear friend (clearly not the case), but we managed to shake her at the gates to JollyBoys. Our Victoria Falls curiosity satisfied we made our way back into Botswana. Maun was the destination in mind. Sadly though, all long distance public transport had departed for the day. So we hitchhiked. In the front of a semi with four brandy drinking (yes, the driver too) local guys. The music was so loud I had to put my earplugs in for protection. Six o'clock put us in Nata, where we worked and mingled to find a ride to Maun, but no such luck. A night at the 24/7 gas station was looking a bit shifty so we forked out a handful of pula for a room at the Nata Guest Inn. Where a blissfully cold shower awaited. Woken by the sunrise, and surprisingly refreshed, we trekked back to the gas station. A tour bus- luxuury transport after our last experience- took us aboard for 60Pula apiece and we set off for Maun. The only obstacle was a disease control checkpoint where our bags were thoroughly searched. We tearfully parted with bags of newly purchased fruits and vegetables. I was then ordered to stomp around in a trough of water. Supposedly laced with foot and mouth disease powder, though I question the effectiveness of such control measures. I felt a bit like a kid in a rain puddle.

Semester Break: Chobe National Park

As I set my fingers upon the keyboard, the long awaited semester break has already become a memory. An unforgettable one. For the sake of organization, and with so much to say, I have split the epic adventure into three parts: Chobe National Park, Victoria Falls, and the Okavango Delta.
Early Saturday morning (so early in fact that I had to walk hurriedly past raucous, drunk party goers) I set off with my Wildlife Biology class for a weekend of research. After a full day of driving, while blazing along a pothole ridden road, I as rewarded with my very first elephant sighting. A huge bull cheerfully breezing its colossal ears. Night set in quickly and, almost inevitably, we hit a mammoth pothole. The tire burst, the rim bent out of shape, and the engine broke down. Then it started pouring rain. Jolly good. We ended up driving the last leg of our journey to Kasane sandwiched into the back of a pick-up truck (8 students, luggage, tents, and dripping mattresses). While others found comfort in the midst of a drunken stupor, I was too cold to feel anything. Needless to say I slept very well that night. The Toro Safari Lodge hosted us for the duration of our stay. A tidy establishment with a lawn boasting “Beware of Hippo” signs. Only in Africa. The gates to Chobe National Park were just a short drive away. The class departed on a reconnaissance drive to familiarize ourselves with the terrain. As the sun set, our jeep parted through a sea of impala and baboons revelled in the trees overhead. Magical. I started off the following day with a python wrapped around my arm. We took a short tour of a local NGO responsible for rescuing abused pets and injured wildlife. After that it was all business. With GPS locator, data sheet, and binoculars in hand I took up the front seat in the survey jeep. The Wildlife Biology class covered 100km of dirt track and made over three hundred animal sightings: water buck, giraffe, elephant, implala, water buffalo, mongoose, kudu, baboon, puku, and zebra. It was one thing to see an elephant at a distance, but an agitated bull male a mere ten feet away is absolutely terrifying. They are not in the least bit hesitant to face down a vehicle, tusks swinging dangerously. Respect the animals.